[x]

Invisibletake a deep breathe and count to ten .

what just happened ... will never happen again .

your hands start to tremble; the sink is cold .

you tell yourself you are strong; you are bold .

don't look in the mirror and stare .

this isn't right ... this isn't fair .

don't think about it too much, or you'll go insane .

tears and blood make their way down the drain .

what just happened ... to me ?

why do you feel so gross and dirty ?

feeling so worthless and wasted .

so unloved , abandoned, and tasted .

having given them everything, every part .

why did they turn, and break your heart ?

shattering every piece, leave you broken .

every

The EscapistIt is really insomnia
If you're keeping me awake?
Is it the infatuation
That made me start to shake?
Is it so peculiar
If you make me feel brand new?
Is it some kind of obsession
That I have with you?

I watch you when I feel lonely
Is that so wrong?
I think of you when they hurt me
So what if that's all day long?
You make me feel so happy
What if that's all I have?
Should that be taken away
Just because it sounds mad?

Because right now in real life
There's no happily ever after
When I see something I don't like
I can't just skip the chapter
Or quickly press fast forward
On a TV remote control
Real life is but a wound
And you help fill the h

Lucifer and VisitorThe Devil mourned his homeland lost

Upon a stone in exile deep

Beneath the great Earth’s hardened crust

Where fires rage inside the sea

Much too far for father sky

To see the rock where The Devil lie

As he lamented, sullen, weary

Expression that of sorrow true

A Thing appeared, and very clearly

Cracked the gates of Lucifer’s tomb

The grin that danced upon his face

Found hell to be the quaintest place

The thing approached and asked him kindly,

“Why do you mourn your banishment?

All the land above I do see

But I’ve never seen an armament

So well hidden from my mighty eyes

Which see all things as they liv

SanctuarySanctuary
I don't know you enough
To even know your last name
But I do know that you've had it rough
As I have felt the same
But you've suffered more in your distress
Making my past sorrows
Seem nothing more than a jest
Knowing atonement heralds tomorrow
Even so, I know the pain
And the committal to aid
In my heart has lain
Of course, if you desire it made
My heart, I swear, broke
When I heard of your troubled emotions
And the stress driving you to provoke
And this stayed in my notion
Maybe I could give comfort
Make the past easier to overlook
Together, rid of our contorts
And be each other's retreating nooks.

AnimalsWe’re animals, we’re beasts who prey
Upon the weak who fear our stay
Its natural to feast and slay
Their hearts bleed in our jowls

We all wear masks and masquerade
As decent creatures, folks who pray
But deep inside, our demons play
Beneath cowardice cowls

The others claim to know the way
Those neutered, tamed, trained to obey
Condemning us for what we say
Look down at us with scowls

They lock our voices in a cage
Restrictions bind, we’re blind with rage
Liberate yourselves, you slaves
Let free your hungry howls

To the vermin calling me scoundrel
I will not heel, I will not bow
You’ll hear the hatred in my growl
Th

*Tears*Soft rain washes tears
Hard love runs down the drain
Solitary now.

2013 Delice1941
20th May2013

My Lonely LoveWipe off your tears
and hold your head high
get rid of your fears
and heave your biggest sigh
Oh, my lonely love

Alone in a crowded room
Feeling so scared
The shadow of isolation looms
and it feels like they don't care
My lonely love

Remembering the times
when it was just us
Sorrow, with its sweetest rhymes
think of it as you must
My lonely love

Crying alone at night
wondering what you did
hearing them fight
when you were only a kid
my lonely love

Told that you were ugly
that you were not good enough
they will just never see
That they weren't all that tough
my lonely love

When it feels as though your soul is gone
And your heart is broken

Notes and LettersI wrote a note the other day,
And with it shared my feelings.
I've tried to have it other ways,
But they seem to be congealing.

I loved the stars when I was young;
The first word of mine was "light".
Of happy thoughts, I once had none,
But now the world's more bright.

I feel too much frustration,
I need to be more calm.
I drown in hesitation,
Too scared to sing my song.

I never was the kind of child
I wish I could have been.
At times I've been more meek and mild,
But later I learned to sin.

I wonder, sometimes, whose life I'm living,
Whose soul endows this frame.
I blunder, sometimes, when what they give me
Doesn't match my name.

For tho

Whence To WhereYou surprise me and confuse me,
And make me love you more.
The brightness may undo me,
The darkness I adore.

There's so much grey,
And so much pain
That brings rejuvenation.
I fall and sink,
But then I blink
Before illumination.

Whence to where is what I asked,
But much is coming clear.
My sadness fading here at last,
And with it all my fears.

You've brought me out,
How can I count
The times you've soothed my soul?
From where I was,
You may become
The star that leads me home.

Light and dark will mold and mix
Till grey is what I see.
A calming sight that seems to fix
What once was wrong with me.

The LiarWhen I found out the truth
The filthy thing under the bed
I screamed and howled
And learned to hate;

For the truth was biting
Bitter and cold
Like a burning hailstorm
That I wished had never unfold

I kept a secret
Told a lie
I spoke words of hatred
Felt something wilt and die

The world was faux
An unattainable fantasy
Hopes were fed to monsters
In my blood that cried blasphemy

I don't think you knew
Because you'd hate me if you did
To know our common blood was false
Of me, you'd surely rid

So I cut you off first
Then you'd never have the chance
To look under the bed
And pierce me through with a lance

I destroyed you first
So I'd not be

Last Day, Last LightDarkness surrounds
Black of darkest night
Not a sound
Last day, last light

A flame flickering to life
Hovering at the cigerette’s end
Only in my head is there strife
Left with my thoughts to fend

Slow drag to kill the pain
What’s there left to do?
The sky dark with storm’s rain
Our society so skewed

We can only realize this
The true power of hatred’s bite
Ignorance is truly bliss
Last day, last light

I hear them draw close
The demons in heart and head
Every weakness, they know
Across a meek world they spread

From the wound red emerges
My time is short, I have no fight
Pulses of pain surges
Last day, last light

Th

EmptyI don't think I have
anymore feelings to give--
for that, I'm sorry.

In tribute to a friendFORGET

To forget a promise made
To forget a heart in pain
To forget a friendship's fade
To forget attempts in vain

To forget the start
To forget the bloody end
To forget what breaks a heart
To forget about about a friend

To forget what you had
To forget what you lost
To forget why she's mad
To forget cruelty's cost

To forget a monster's sins
To forget an artist's layers
To forget the bloody skins
To forget silenced prayers

To forget a line of lies
To forget what most would hide
To forget a horrid cry
To forget who's heart will bide

Please forget
Forget to have known
Forget to have been shown
Forget everything,
You are not alone

Dreaming on a CanvasIn the Moonlight

Look into a fathomless night and see the constellation flicker
Removed from our existence is a speck long and gone
A smoky stream of purple fog moving like a breeze, yet thicker
Seen by those who roam along an endless black beyond

An everlasting journey, past a thought amidst a wall
Here I may attempt to fly, here I sleep and here I cry
I turned around within myself, peeled away my lids and saw
My skeleton standing by itself, ageless on a shelf and dry

Mystery was my reason and my final destination why
Questions are my purpose, yet the answers only sound obscene.
For I walk eternally and soon begin the day I die
All along

13. MisfortuneYou took the vow,
You said you would.
By all accounts,
Your word was good.
You loved me,
That much was clear.
And I loved you.
You know that, dear.
So please explain,
Why did you leave?
So much pain,
With no reprieve.
Did our love end?
Not on my side.
Was it pretend?
Or has it died?
Alli know, I'm
A single mom
With two young kids.
I miss you, Tom.

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A Sad SmileA sad smile
Pains more than a frown
A glimpse of a loved one
As they silently drown
A broken smile
That speaks of frustration
A choked laugh
Full of desperation
A troubled smile
That speaks of a fight
Worried eyes
Searching for light
A bitter smile
That thinks it's too late
A mind given in
To a horrible fate
A wistful smile
Can mean nothing good
Most of all if its meaning
Is misunderstood
A sad smile
Is far worse than a frown
For it's the smile of someone
Who's accepted they'll drown
A.Heimby
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Same Old TaleI keep on trying
But I always fail
It keeps on changing
But it's the same old tale
I try to fight it
But it always wins
It leaves me wondering
What were my sins
What did I do
To deserve this strife
Why can't I
Simply lead a happy life
It keeps getting harder
To keep up this fight
And I'm finding
I don't have the might
I'm too tired
To repeat the past
Every time it's tougher
To simply last
To not give up
Before the start
To not give in
To my aching heart
It's insanity to try
When I know the result
After so many fails
It's only my fault
I know I can't fix this
And it won't go away
The best I can do
Keep it shortly at bay
I need someone's help
I can't fix it alone
I can't break this cycle
All on my own
But that's the problem
I'm doomed to repeat
I can't ask for help
When I expect deceit
If I can't trust
Those who say they care
Then how can I trust
They'll truly be there
So as long as I'm stuck
Without any support
The result will continue
Be the same report
I will try
And I will fail
It wi

Barely by a ThreadI try to hold it together
I try so damn hard
But I'm still dangling here
Barely by a thread
I just can't do it
I'm in so much pain
I can't see any good
Holding on can gain
A persons not meant
To do this on their own
It's to much suffering
To go through alone
The threads not helping
I need a hand
This thread is breaking
And there's nowhere to land
I just can't do this
It's making me lose my mind
Why can't I be selfish
If reliefs what I'll find
I just want to let go
I just want it to end
I can't do this alone
But there's no help to lend
...
...
...
...
I'm just too tired
To not let go.
If given the choice,
I'd go with... below...
April 4th, 2013
A. Heimby

Sonnet 1 : Sitting at nightI'm blinded by sight
it's too much to bear.
I'm overwhelmed by the fight
it takes just too simply care.
I sit in the silence
listening to the night.
I feel less defiance
when there is no light.
No light to blind me.
I almost feel peace.
Though the day makes me see,
the night comes back, at least.
I'm really just hoping, that for once I'll find,
Just once in my life, a slightly clearer mind.
March 27th, 2013
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Simply WhyI don't feel connected
Always in a haze
My mind feels off
Like I'm in a daze
I don't care about family
Yet I'm still empathetic
But that takes to much energy
So often, I wish I was apathetic
The people around me
Don't provide any comfort
All they've ever done
Was give me reasons to hurt
I don't want to be like this
I wish I could care
But the worlds proved to often
That it never is fair
I tried for so long
To fight back my tears
I tried to fight
For so many years
But I've grown to tired
From this constant fight
I've become far to blinded
By the complete lack of light
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That I didn't try
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You'd know that's a lie
...My minds given up
And so have I
That's the simple reason
Why I'm ready to...
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Rock Bottom...I feel like I am falling
That I am far long gone
I feel like there's no ending
I've been falling far too long
There's no escape or stopping
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But everybody ran
I am falling into darkness
The lights been gone for years
Even if I tried to scream
It would just fall to deaf ears
You have to hit rock bottom
Before you can stand up tall
But what if there's no bottom
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If there's not a bottom
Then there is not an end
If there's no rock bottom
Then there's not a chance to mend...
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Submitted: November 7, 2012
Submitted with: Sta.sh Writer

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Supposed to help

by ~Ready2reid, Nov 7, 2012, 3:20:42 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Traditional Fixed Forms

This was supposed to help
Make it go away
So why do I
Feel so much pain

No one sees
that I am faking
No one knows
That I am breaking

But just one sec
I got that wrong
I've already broken
Am far long gone

I've already shattered
Fallen to the floor
Broken to pieces
I can't break any more

I'm just shards
Of what I was
I don't know myself
But no one does

I put on a smile
And hide my pain
But I can't act
So it's done in vain

But they still don't see
Or maybe they choose
They don't want to help
If they know I'll lose

I thought this would help
Make it go away
But I still spend
Every moment in pain

I'm still broken
Past repair
Even more convinced
They just don't care

Nothing has helped
I'm still alone
But I guess that's fine
I'm used to being on my own

I've broken down
So many times
And every time
I make stupid rhymes

But soon enough
It will be too much
I just need some help
A comforting touch

But I break alone
So no one can see
So how can I think
That they'll help me

I tried to ignore it
Even crying at night
But this is a war
Not a one person fight

I still need help
I can't do it alone
But I've accepted
I'm on my own

I've accepted the shards
Of my broken soul
I've accepted this gaping
Deep, dark hole

I thought it would help
But I still cry 'til dawn
I guess, once again,
I was just horribly wrong

November 7th, 2012

A. Heimby

Supposed to helpby ~Ready2reid

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Traditional Fixed Forms

~NinthTome Jan 17, 2013

These words are powerful and moving...I want to comfort the writer.

"Keep your chin up, you have so much talent to give, but most of all know that you are not alone."

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